My week

I just came home from helping my senior guy tonight. I went straight to the basement to get an old cassette tape (we have at least 60 of them) to record over. I borrowed neighbor E.'s tape recorder so I can make a study tape for myself to listen to while driving. I grab the first tape find in this huge mess of a box. I turn it on to see what I'm about to record over and it is Sarah when she was about 2 1/2!! She sounds soooo sweet! She in very clear and speaks in these fantastically long sentences. Much more than Eamon's 3 word clumpings. Not that I'm comparing, but she has always been a talker! I think her high-intensity personality forced language a little earlier so she could say what she wanted to get what she needed. Life became so much easier when she 1. began to walk and 2. began to talk. It is so Sarah through and through. I wish I was technically savvy enough to transfer her sweet talking from tape to computer, but nah, not me.

I'll have to play it to her in the morning. On the tape I'm obviously eating something and I ask if she wants a bite. And she says: No it's too yucky. I don't like that food.
And I said: Do I look like the type of person who would eat yucky food?
Sarah says: Yes! You do! You like yucky food and I -do- not!

She's only 2 months older than what Eamon is now. I can't imagine having conversations like that with him. He certainly talks, and understands, but Sarah understood humor and sarcasm early on (gee, with Greg and I for parents, its no wonder about the sarcasm!). Very sweet.

This week has been busy and nice and I can't believe tomorrow is already Friday. Today I had a prenatal with my new due in December client. She's very sweet and level-headed. I like her a lot. Feels good. She's having her second baby.

Its very cold out tonight. There's actually a frost warning in effect. Had to bring in our bay plant and rosemary. Days have been lovely, mid 60s, sunny/cloudy and little windy. Came home tonight and Greg had the space heater going in our bedroom. It was like a sauna in there. Its not even cold in the house. Of course he is sleeping in running shorts and a tshirt, while the kids and I all have proper pajamas on. Its taken him 10 years to finally wear slippers. We'll see if we can't goad him into some flannel pants this winter.

I finally received my prize-winning pillows from the Joy Browne show for the bit I wrote about why we deserved the Sleep Number bed (that I didn't win). The pillows are nice. A "down alternative". Very squishy and neck supporting. Greg doesn't sleep with a pillow so now we have 6 on our bed. I feel like a pregnant woman in my nest of pillows. Actually, I only use 2, one for my head and one between my knees, otherwise my hips hurt. I used to sleep with one, flat pillow (on my back) before I had kids. Now I'm all pillow-needy and on my belly (certainly from co-sleeping, Please Get Off My Boobs, breastfeeding mom induced change). I still love to sleep on my back (with pillow under my knees) but Eamon still unconsciously squiggles over and I quickly flip over only to have him flop on my back.

Gee, how I use a pillow. Earth-shattering excitement in this post.

Weeks summary:
worked for the senior, cleaned the credit union, had a pap/pelvic, discussed getting IUD next month (scheduled!), initial prenatal with new client, repacked my birth bags with new items purchased, don't have to work my 2-5 shift tomorrow but do have the 6-11. saturday the ladies and i are supposed to go to Corner Brewery for drinks in the evening. Yahoo.

The Detroit historical museum (if that's the right name) has totally re-done itself (um, with the help of contractors and humans, I'm sure) and has free admission this weekend. Its one of my fave museums and I haven't been there in at least 8 years. Thinking about taking the kids. They have free admission this weekend but that might make it too crazy. On the other hand, I don't know if anyone will necessarily be swarming the place either.

Sandra Cisneros spoke at U of M tonight for free and I came a sliver close to calling off work to see her. I love love love her writing. She's a really cool lady. I hope Tammy and Clint were able to go, I begged Tammy to go. After all, she's the one who turned me on to her.

All right, exciting post over. I was intending to start my study tape this evening, but I can't get myself to go back into the cold basement for another tape. And it's already 20 to midnight.

Peace with imperfection

I'm very happy. And tired.
It's late. Checking emails before going to bed, had an urge to post on here but realized I have nothing much to say. I'm happy though.
Like someone shook my little snow globe world and everything is settling into place, not perfectly, but also not in any way that I have to freak out about. It's peaceful, not perfect and that feels good. And mostly it feels like something in my perception has changed, and I'm liking it. Maybe turning one year older gave me a little iota of wisdom that I didn't have before. I'll take it.

Going in for my yearly pap and pelvic tomorrow. Woo hoo. I actually don't mind at all. Meeting a new doctor. Praying for no abnormal results. No more big C word for the little c.
Should be fine, I am healthy. Will ask about IUD.

Lots on my to-do list. Must get around to studying again. There's no time in the day. At least, not any time that doesn't involve keeping one small boy entertained and safe. Naps are getting shorter and shorter for him.

Ach. Okay. very tired. good night.

My Jewish New Year

I love this picture. Someone somewhere had it as their avatar and I saved the picture. I think as a child I always expected to see this on Batman and it just never happened. You can't get much more homoerotic than grown men in tight underpants on top of colorful tights, dashing around and pointing laser guns at villains. I also love this picture because it's such a tender looking kiss, no?

So its Friday night again. I've done both senior jobs today. Its finally autumn and I'm loving it. It was in the 30s the other morning, but then turned into the most beautiful sun shiney day of about 70 degrees and no humidity.

With the colder weather comes good meals once again. I just can't seem to cook proper meals when its hot out. We graze all summer and Ijust don't like it. But all the cookbooks are down and open and we've been making different breads and savory pies. Really good food and nice sit down dinners as opposed to everyone grazing on bits of different things and everyone being cranky as a result.

This week has been a nice one (although I can sense my underlying anxiety about not having enough money for bills coming up~ I'm trying to keep a grip on this and not freak out). The weather is lovely, the kids have been great, Greg and I are doing fab. I have been realizing that I am a very lucky girl to still really be in love with him. Even when totally pissed (which hasn't been for a couple months), I still really like and love him. I've not had that awful experience of wanting to recoil from his touch or his words like I have in the past in other relationships (and you realize: Uh-oh, that's not good.) And I realize this seems silly to say because we've been married for 11 years, but I'm feeling very grateful for still having such strong, good feelings this man. The other day I was driving and found myself checking out some guy on the street. I was thinking: I want to lick his shoulders, he's like Greg. Then shook myself out of my daydreaming at the red light and had to laugh. Everyone admires pretty people on the street, I guess its a good sign if you're admiring someone who resembles your partner.

I've had this wonderful sense of counting my blessings this week. I really miss going to church and I'm going to do my best to go there this Sunday. I was planning on coming back once school started again, but the past few Sundays have been busy. I'm looking forward to hearing Thomas play his gorgeous, intricate and difficult classical pieces on the huge church organ. I'm looking forward to Nora's fabulous sermons (the last one convinced me to not renew my Sam's Club membership {corporate sin! one of those things I've known about forever but ignored whenever I needed a large quanity of some bulky Sam's Club item} ).

My mom was over Tuesday and was annoying me with her yearly groans about how sad it is summer is ending and how the shorter days make her blue and how she hates these long winters... this speech has been annoying me since I was a little girl. Even back then I knew that it was all about how she perceived things and went about her life that often made her so depressed. It made me crazy then and it makes me crazy now. (A good example of this is how she says every year: "I hate my birthday. I've never had a good birthday. My mother ruined it for me when I was 7 and I've hated it ever since." She'd say this despite us kids trying madly to entertain her and provide her with the best birthday we could muster. When I was about 22 I totally laid into her about how she has the ability to DECIDE if she wants to be happy about any day she wakes up to. And its up to her to have a good birthday! She celebrates it properly now, like a normal person.) At any rate, back to the season changing.... I've always loved autumn. The weather finally grows mild and there's an equal mix of cool rainy days and lovely sunny ones. You can cook again. The summer garden is pretty much done and you don't have to mow the grass too many more times. All the extra work of summer is done. It's time to hole up in the house and let the ground go to sleep for a while. I love this notion. Its peaceful. And it has the feeling of winter being "break time".

I've always considered this time of year to be when my new year starts. January 1st is a ridiculous time of year for ringing in the new year. There is absolutely nothing remarkable about January 1st. Its the middle of winter. The middle of dormancy. Why January 1st? (I realize its not that way the world over, but mostly it is.) Yesterday I made challah bread. A beautiful braided bread. It always looks so pretty when its done. Today when I was helping my one senior couple, I learned it was Rosh Hashanah, Jewish New Year. I've always known it was this time of year because it often falls on my birthday. But I never put the two together until today when we were picking up loaves of challah from the bakery so they could celebrate the new year with their friends tonight. While I was there, they received 4 phone calls from people wishing them a happy new year. How cool is that? Here it was a lovely fall day, with bright mums and pumpkins at the market. Yummy challah and honey cake in the bakery for the special day. So much nicer than January 1st in Michigan. January 1st is like post partum depression. You're trying really hard to be happy, you know you should be counting your blessings, but you just want to crawl under a rock and sleep.

Nope, I much prefer celebrating as the Jews do. And on some level, I always have, without knowing it (even as a 7 year old Catholic!). And making the challah was purely coincidental. But very yummy.

I'm very grateful for where I am in life. I'm grateful that despite some things not being how I would like them, I now have the ability to trust the process a lot better than I ever have. I'm trying to respect what comes at me every day, the good and the bad, and trying really hard to not be lazy and to also not be neurotic (those scales seem to shift heavily in one direction or another for me). My 33rd birthday is Sunday. I'm grateful for that. I'm happy to have had another year and to start a new one. It is my New Year. Thank you thank you.

In other news: my poor sister is having her uterus removed in mid-October. She has to have this done abdominally because it is so enlarged and painful. Right now her uterus is the size of a 4 month pregnant uterus. She's scared to death to have this operation. How terrible to have had 3 kids vaginally only to have to receive a c-section of sorts to remove your womb. On top of this, she has yet another suspicious lump in her breast that sent her to the breast clinic today for ultrasound and biopsy. Pray she is healthy and all things will go well for her. Poor thing.

All right. I'm off to bed. Its midnight now. I'm reading this interesting book by Kamran Nazeer called: Send in the Idiots. He's a high-functioning autistic who has written a book about some of the people he went to school with (a special autistic school that was pretty cutting edge for its time, apparently). Each chapter he describes these individuals as they are now as adults with autism. So far, all of them are pretty high-functioning but with very clear boundaries about what they can and cannot deal with. I'm only half way through and I only have time to read 7 or so pages each night before I totally crash out (my days of having the luxury to read hundreds of pages a day are so far gone!). I always wonder if I'm getting the full impact of every book I read since it takes me a while anymore. Its so nice though, to quitely climb into bed where Greg and Eamon are sprawled all over, to lay on my side and read by the dim light of the night light. I get this little quiver of excitement that everyone is home, happy and quiet and I am awake, able to lay and read in peace.

Friday Yadirf

Today is my long day doing senior care. For some reason the thought of it wears me out, but it's really not a big deal and I usually enjoy myself while there.
I've had Tuesday and Thursday off this week because my one client had to have some minor surgery. It was so nice to go to bed at 9pm and sleep, as opposed to my usual midnight when I'm working. And surprise, surprise, my back pain, which has been really intense for the last few weeks is totally gone when I'm able to get enough sleep.

Sarah is staying the night at a school friend's house tonight and then camping with Brownies for Saturday and Sunday. I hope she does okay and has lots of fun. I won't see her until Sunday at noon since I'll be gone when she gets home today. Crazy. My Little is growing up.
We packed her bag for camping. It's huge, but it contains nothing more than what is on the list.

Took both kids for their well child visits yesterday. As usual, my kids are off the chart with their hugeness. Their genetic brick-shithouse builds! Eamon is the same height and weight as Sarah was at his age. Sarah has always been in the 98% for height and weight and Eamon is following. I got lectured about wise shopping habits and no fast food, etc. from the doctor who takes a lot of home birth patients. This guy knows me and it bugged the crap out me being told how to read labels and cook as close to whole foods as I can and always try to steer clear of fast food. No kidding, pal. I know my daughter is chunky. My husband and his family are built like that. I was the same size at her age. I don't know why she's chunky. But I'm not going to freak out about it. I was told for years how fat I was by my dad (having a brother and a sister who were teeny tiny petite types). Greg is worried because he was a fat child, but not until they moved to the States when he was 9. It was totally emotional eating for him. I've seen pictures, he was a fat little bugger. He thinned out in highschool b/c he played so much sports.
Its not fair. I know plenty of skinny, skinny kids who live on crap. And here's my girl who eats pretty darn well (almost all home-cooked, no processed foods) and I feel I'm being accused of feeding her crap and letting her pig out. Its frustrating and hard. I will not harp on her weight or make any comments about it because I know all too well how detrimental that can be. We all exercise and eat well in this house. I don't know what more we can do.

Greg read my blog for the first time ever after I sent him a link to read the Bloody Confusion post. He didn't say anything, but was very sweet and just gave me a big hug, which was all I wanted. We shall see. I feel no pressing need to talk about baby making right now. Just wanted to get it off my chest.

All right. I have laundry to fold and things to get into order before I leave for the day.

My sister came by today after a doctors appointment with the news that she will have a partial hysterectomy in October to remove her very inflamed, troublesome uterus. Its so inflamed one can feel it over her pubic bone as if she were 3 months pregnant. Poor thing has 16 day cycles and a lot of pain. Not to mention anemia with periods, and hemorrhage-like blood loss and clots. Has been this way for months. It seems the right thing to do at this point. Shes had other therapies for this in the past and she just wants to be done with it.

Bloody Confusion

My periods this year have settled into an almost normal 28 day cycle. In the past they were usually 31-32 days. In August it started at 26 days. This I believe because I was at an intense but beautiful labor with a doula client. Breathing through every contraction with her for hours made me crampy and it was no surprise to find blood when I came home.
My period (at 28 days) should have started on the 5th. It didn't. I waited for Tammy to go into labor knowing that birth hormones always push me into bleeding. The 6th passed, then the 7th, the 8th. Every day I re-counted the days to make sure I was right. I weighed myself, desperateley searching for those extra 3 pounds I always put on with a period. Instead, I had lost 4. (Surely to a bit of stress and lots of running around!) Ironically, I was finally at my real pre-pregnancy weight before Eamon. Those 4 pounds stuck with me like glue for the last 18 months.
I was worried. I really thought about buying a pregnancy test as days 32, 33 went past. I thought about Greg's reaction (or at least, the reaction I imagined, and it wasn't nice). I imagined Greg getting all worse-case-scenario and knew I couldn't handle that. Couldn't handle the "we'll have to sell our house" and "we'll never get ahead" rants. Ugh. I'll even admit that my vain side was quite pleased to see those last 4 pounds gone, but only to be pregnant again? When I was planning on buying myself a pair of those skinny Audrey Hepburn black pants they have at the mall? It takes me a full 2 years to get rid of the boobs and curves of pregnancy and nursing. How vain!
I put off buying a pregnancy test because I wasn't ready to see any result. I was so excited to have finally had a couple of consults with perspective clients. I was excited to have met some sweet women Saturday at the community expo who were trying to get pregnant and asked me lots of questions. I even went so far as to figure out my due date, should I be pregnant: May 15th.
I knew I would take clients due until mid-April. And then perhaps take people due after mid-June. I would take my baby to births with me. I wanted to tell someone this possible news. I didn't. It was very unlike me too. I usually need to tell someone, either Tammy or Kate or my sister.
After my consult yesterday, I went to the credit union to clean. I used the restroom and found blood. A swift melancholy swooped down on me and took over. I cried.

What is this?
What is this push and pull at wanting to establish myself as a midwife, as a provider for our family, and yet yearn so for new life growing in me? It's not fair.
No sir, it's Just Not Fair.

When I came home I told Greg about this little "scare" of possibly being pregnant. Of how I imagined him being angry, scared, worse-case-scenario. He said, "No, I don't think so. It would've been fine. Although, I don't know how it could've happened. We didn't have any accidents."
I said, "Every time your penis is in me and I'm ovulating is a potential for an accident. Not just when you fail to pull out." Duh! (as I roll my eyse like a 13 year old girl)

Later in th kitchen he came up behind me and pulled me close, hands rubbing my belly. He said, "Well, we can keep trying you know."
Startled, I gulped out, "What?!"
"And the big boobs that come with it are always a nice perk!" he laughed.

I spun away with a smile and utter confusion. Yearning more for a new little life in me. Immediately making peace with curvier hips and no Audrey Hepburn Skinny Black Pants.
Completely in love with my husband. And completely confused as to what my life focus should be right now.

The crazy thing about all of this. If I had been pregnant, our kids would have almost the exact same age gaps as my sister, brother and me. My sister is nearly 8 years older than me (Sarah would've been too), my brother 3 years older than me (Eamon would've been too) and then a little #3. Surely a girl as my mom had had. Girl Boy Girl. Well actually, she had a stillborn at 7 months with her real #3, and that was a boy before I came along.

At any rate, I'm feeling completely homey, slightely melancholy but in a good way that I am honoring. I want to have a good long talk with Greg to say: What do we want here?! Should we try or should we push on?
I was planning on getting an IUd at the end of the month too. Sheesh, now all of that is so out of my head. Before Greg would say we'd try for a baby in 5 years. But I don't want to be 38 and pregnant. I grow big babies and my lower back and pelvis is a mess when pregnant. I feel like either in the next year or so or never.
We shall see. We never have time to talk like this.
And I have to work tonight.

blessings a go-go

What a hugely busy and fulfilling week!
Tuesday afternoon I was temporarily stranded at Kate's house with the kids (we had walked there) because a big fast and furious rainstorm came on like nobody's business. I called Greg to come pick us up. We were soaked to the bone just by strapping the kids into the backseat.
At home I started dinner and called Tammy. No answer. I left a message asking how she was doing with the big barometric pressure shift (the way sudden shifts can put ladies in labor~little did I know they didn't get a drop of rain during all of that). As soon as I hung up Clint called saying: Tammy's water just broke!
Now is that crazy or what? And they hadn't even heard my message.
I dropped everything and went to their house, as Tammy has this lovely history of: Pop! Goes the Water! and 2-3 hours later: Here Comes the Baby! I called off work and cursed the traffic on the way.
But nothing happening. I stayed for 2 hours or so and left. Thinking surely things will start in the night when kids are fed and in bed (like so many moms do). I had my wonderful neighbor and mom on the side, ready to pop into action to watch the kids. That night I restlessly slept. I dreamed of catching 3 different babies, all with no gloves on (which grossed me out). I woke up every 45 minutes or so to check my that my cell phone was working and on. Finally the alarm woke me up.
It was Sarah's first day of school. A lovely morning. Dropped her off and went back to Tammy's to listen to the baby. Sounded great. High heart tones like always, always (GIRL!~~ I did have a dream about a month ago that it was a girl, and my gender dreams while I was pregnant were always right too!) Discussed different options, my protocol, the medical system's protocols for prolonged ruptured membranes, etc.
Picked Sarah up from school. Mowed the grass (got sweaty but didn't want to shower yet b/c I still had to clean the credit union). Made dinner, then drove to Tammy's . Still, not a whole lot of contractions at all. One here, one there. Baby sounded fine. Tammy doing well. Clint a little anxious. All of us really wanting to meet this wee baby.
So I cleaned the credit union. Got done in enough time so I could do a last-minute consult with a couple (who were very sweet and asked such good questions~like they've actually thought why they want a homebirth more than a defiant answer of: I dont wanna be at the hospital! ~ I mean, that's great and all, but there's a lot more to it). Got home at 8:30. Talked to Tammy who was chatty as always. Told me that she was having "some" contractions every 10 or so minutes, "maybe" (I could picture her rolling her eyes as she said it.) Said to call back if things changed.
I nursed Eamon to sleep and was reading Sarah Little House when Clint called and said: TammyIsHavingContractionsEvery5MinutesAndWantsYouToCome!!!

I got there 20 minutes later to this incredible birthing mama contracting every 2 minutes (she later reported that she had her "stop and thankful" rest just before I got there! Yowza!)
My friend and assistant Sarah arrived minutes after me. All of the equipment and supplies we had set up upstairs the day before needed to be brought down b/c their little guy was asleep in their bed. So Sarah, Clint and me gingerly walked up and down the stairs gathering things as Tammy did her moaning, rocking labor thing.

By the time everything was set-up, Tammy told us the baby was coming. Gloves! Where are they?! I get them quick and clumsily, 2 fingers in one hole, etc. Argh, just like my dream! Tammy is standing like this gorgeous Aztec birthing goddess, upright and so strong, Clint in front of her, steadying her. I ask if she wants to get down on the floor. No. She stand wants to stand. Amazing. Baby scalp just appearing, oozing out incrementally with one steady contraction. No pushing, just the uterus pushing down, down. The head comes out. Over the head comes big clots of blood. I wipe them away, and more come out. I wipe off the baby's nose and try to keep all this blood from going up it. Sarah and I look at each other and raise eyebrows. Where are these big clots coming from? It appears that nothing has torn. I feel for a cord around the neck and don't find one. But my one finger in allows more clots to come out.
Not worried because I know this baby is coming out any second, and it does, followed by more clots. I find her cord is wrapped up under one arm, across her back and looped over the other arm, under her armpit and back around (like the outside hem of a vest).
Because Tammy is standing, I gently catch baby onto my chest, as I receive her, her eyes flash open and look at me, like a fish looks at you as it swims out of your hands. She closes them. Her fist swings up and manages to get inside my happy, smiling mouth and I laugh because I dreamed of not having gloves and now I have a bloody fist in my mouth?! But I know and love these people (and I've got the low-down on their blood work!)
Clint looks around Tammy's shoulder and announces: It's a Girl!
Holy cow! That's awesome! I hadn't seen for myself yet and always let the parents announce it anyway. Tammy said later that she had seen that it was a girl when she first came out.
This baby is dusky purple. The same shade I remember their last baby being. I assume its the Mexican showing through like beautiful sunset colors. It doesn't worry me. She makes a few gasps, but is mostly quiet. No squawking, screaming newborn. She is a little slow to breathe on her own, so I do one little puff to get her going. It works, she cries and then is quiet again. About 4 minutes later Tammy informs us the placenta has just come out. No surprise. This sweet little one was pulling it out with her (which probably explains her slow breathing start).
The older boys came down stairs and were so smiley and sweet. Everyone oohed and aahed over the concept of a GIRL in the house!
And that is that! This sweet, clever baby girl was nursing with a perfect latch a half hour later. Tammy's bleeding was minimal. Just a wee little tear that will heal fine with the herbal baths and rest.

What a privilege and an honor to catch a friends baby, not once, but twice in a lifetime!
Good, good stuff. I've been on this little high for days.

Yesterday I did a quick morning visit with Tammy, then did a bunch of annoying errands. Stuffed 44 little muslin bags full of comfrey, lavender, and uva ursi for give-away herbal baths (with my business info on, of course) for this local birth expo tomorrow. Last night and tonight I've helped my one senior client go through and organize tons of photos he took while in the army from 1946-48. Pictures of Paris, Frankfurt, and other areas of Germany. Bombed out buildings, destroyed bridges, miles of trains looking like skeletons since they too were bombed. The Paris pics are all touristy stuff (the Concorde, the Obelisk, the Eiffel Tower, etc), but they're neat to see because he was 19 and in a woolen army uniform. He's now 79! I tell ya, not a bad gig. I sit at a kitchen table drinking Diet Coke (he's a diabetic) and we cut out old captions and place them with the photos in new books. And lately his girlfriend has been hanging out with us and I love her best. She's the sweetest woman. Lucky me.
Today was full but nice. Saw Tammy and the baby this morning for a checkup and the horrible newborn screening. Received the nicest card and yummy raspberry lambic as an extra gift. So nice!
After that I had a quick breakfast with "The Other" Amanda. Good time catching up on each other's lives.
After that I went to the bank and to the hardware store (Greg has been using his free time this week to do all kinds of work to our boiler pipes and gas pipes, which has meant a lot of visits for lengths of pipe, copper elbows, etc).
Home again. Eamon nursed to sleep. I clean the house, go to another hardware store. Then its time for me to go.
Go to Kate's to get a gift certificate for massage (my entry fee for the birth expo~ they raffle off the prizes from vendors).
Next, hit up Office Max for the brochures I ordered earlier this week.I had them printed on the wrong paper. Too thin, a little disappointed, yet pleased because it was soo much cheaper than the heavier stuff from last time.
By 2pm I was at myFriday 2-5 gig with the other senior couple. Ran around doing shopping and errands which always makes the time fly.
At 5pm I had to go to the hospital to set-up my table for the expo tomorrow.
Home by 5:30, quick eat a crappy veggie burger. Greg came home with the kids. I see them for 15 minutes before I head off to my 6-11 gig. That flew by too (with all the old photos), and he let me go at 10:20 (still get paid for 6-11).

Tomorrow mom is watching the kids so I can sit from 10-2 at this expo. Sarah has a birthday party from noon-2 and I'm still trying to figure out a way to get her there. (My mom doesn't want to drive with the kids in her car with her bad eye. And bad me is like, "Aw, c'mon. It's just 5minutes up the road!")
I've got to clean sometime this weekend.
Sunday I have a consult for folks due in March. They live an hour away. My dad is taking the kids after we have breakfast to my sister's house so she can watch them.

PHEW! I look forward to next week. It will be Sarah's first full week of school. I'm no longer on call. It will be our real chance to get used to this Sarah school/ Mama work routine.
Greg has been completely awesome.
He's totally stepped up and doing 50% of the housework now that I'm all over the place. And maybe even more. He's doing stuff I never think to do, like taking down all the curtains and washing them. He's vacuumed all the radiators out. He's also figured out that if he takes the kids out of the house to do fun things like go to the park or library, they're happy, mostly well-behaved and the time goes by faster! He reported this to me with pride. I smiled and acted happy for him that it was going so swell. Part of me wanted to hug him for being such a good dad. But part of me wanted to clock him in the eye for taking 7 years to comprehend what I've been telling him about this whole parenting thing.

Ah well, it's all good. My back is killing me though. I'm going to bed. It's after midnight now and the excitement of the last few days is sinking in.

Little Chicky Turns 7!

Here's my lovely toothless 7 year old! Time has gone by soooo quickly.
Next week she starts second grade. Wow.
This time 7 years ago I had just came back from a prenatal with my midwife. I was 1o days past my due date and wanted to have my baby so badly! I'd been dilated to 7cm for a week and a half, my membranes stripped 3 times and no signs of labor anywhere. So we agreed to come back later for them to break my water. In a way, I was disappointed it wasn't spontaneous labor. It felt scheduled, and I hated that. Greg and I packed our bags and went to the hospital. After breaking my water, it took about 5 hours of walking around to get contractions to come. Once they did, it was fast, furious, and overwhelming. Little Chicken was born 2 1/2 hours later.On the 1st of September.On my brother's birthday. A Wednesday child and a perfectionistic Virgo!
She's such a little power house. A no-nonsense girl like my sister. A sweet girl and a nurturing big sister.
What a blessing!