written yesterday, posted today

This morning I am GASP!! becoming an actual member of an actual Christian church!!
It's a good thing, really.

I was raised Catholic. First Communion, white dress and praying hands (with rosary accessory) at age 7 and thought I was the next Virgin M. Virgin Mandy. Hmm.
At any rate, once a little older, I learned about some of the not so nice things the Catholic church has been involved in over the centuries. And then of course, the anti-abortion issue, the anti contraceptive issue, the way the Vatican is run like Las Vegas, etc. and I just had to drop the whole thing like hot, rotten fish.

But I missed the good, good feeling I got from church and from my own personal prayer. (I always loved going to the births of the Catholic women as an apprentice. Their houses were filled with gold icons of saints and the cross and CDs of monks chanting while the woman moaned in labor.)It's been a long road trying to find a spiritual niche that felt right for me but I'm pretty happy with what I have found. So after going to this church for 2 years, I'm becoming a member. And I'm excited about it.

So there you go. I'm out of the closet.

I am officially coming out as a Christian! But not to fear, I still talk trash like a sailor, have an IUD, have kinky sex, drink beer, smoke the occasional cigarette at a party, and yell at my children (like the rest of the Christians) -- the difference is, I don't DENY it!
(Okay, so that WAS talking trash)

But it feels like a good thing. Like one of those velour blankets on a cold night when your bones hurt.